Coffee? Tea? Serenity?

Each year, on All Souls Day, St. Peter's parish remembers their recently deceased parishioners by presenting their family members with a small gift in their memory. On Nov. 2, a small group of our family gathered at St. Peter's Church to receive that gift in memory of Grandma Foreman. The Mass was said in its normal format with the exception of the short presentation of gifts immediately following the homily.

The church was solemn. The people were revenant. The pains felt when losing a loved one to death were evident. As I looked around, I saw families whom had buried loved ones in January. We had done so in April. Some had done so as recently as a few weeks ago. As I looked into the faces of those present, I realized that the pain that was so fresh in my heart was also fresh in theirs. It didn't matter how long ago, or how recently, we joined our hearts as one in memory of those who are no longer with us.

During the Mass, I recalled the numerous times that I had seen my grandmother enter the church - always in her quickly paced steps. I recalled as a young girl how she would occasionally pick me up to assist her in doing some cleaning in the church. I recalled her being a Eucharistic minister. I recalled her stepping up to the altar in reverence to prepare for the Mass and her passing a little wink at us as though she were saying, "See, it's good to serve the Lord." It was almost as though she would step onto the altar at any moment to do that once more, but then I glanced over at the pew that had once been her place to sit during Mass. Although that pew could have been filled with other people, it will always look empty to me.

Going back to St. Peter's church will never be the same. Driving down the road in front of her home will never be the same. Going back to her home will never be the same. Christmas will never be the same. No holiday will ever be the same. Our lives have changed because one whom we love has passed from this life and entered into eternal life.

Each day that dawns, opens a new page in life. Each day that ends brings the close of a chapter from the past. As the chapters close, we learn to live with the events on those pages, and sometimes we return to them for a brief visit. No new page will ever return to us those that we miss so dearly, but as we turn the new pages we can hope that the sadness that fills our hearts today will one day be replaced with hope. Hope that we "shall obtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away." (Isaiah 35:10)